A few weeks ago, I recorded an episode of the podcast called “Freedom From Your Emotional Pain.” You can find it at HalElrod.com/338 if you haven’t listened to it yet. 

Within that episode, I shared the following quote: “Consider that every painful emotion you have ever experienced has been self-created by resisting your reality. It’s never the thing we think we’re upset about that’s actually upsetting us. It is our resistance. When you accept reality exactly as it is, you are at peace.”

This turned out to be one of the most shared episodes of the podcast I’ve had in a long time, and in addition to some very positive feedback, I also heard from a few people who were in pain and very upset about that quote. They understandably interpreted it as me meaning that our pain is our fault, when my meaning is really intended to identify and overcome the root cause of the pain itself. 

Today, in order to help clarify and expand on this message, I’m reading you a chapter from one of my all-time favorite books: Loving What Is by Byron Katie and sharing my interpretation of her message, and how I’ve personally implemented it into my life. In my opinion, Byron Katie understands better than just about anyone how to greet emotional pain with acceptance and love, and find peace within it.


  • How to assess whether or not a painful thought is true. 
  • How to absolutely know where a painful thought is coming from – and how to turn it around. 
  • How to investigate your own thinking and what you experience when you believe a thought. 
  • How to ask yourself whether a thought (and what it does to you) is worth keeping around.



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