When we accept life before it happens, we get to keep the power that adversity will try to take away from us. We get to control the narrative. Instead of focusing on “why me?”, we can instead choose how we give meaning to something. In other words, adversity doesn’t hurt you, it serves you!
Which is what you learned in Part 1 of “Beating Cancer: A Dialogue On Converting Adversity into Advantage”. If you haven’t heard it, I encourage you to go back and check it out!
In Part 2, we continue the conversation and dive deep into what matters the most. I break down the most profound lessons learned since being diagnosed with cancer, including the 3 factors (Perspective, Love & Gratitude, and Freedom) that have completely transformed the way I now see the world.
This conversation actually may surprise a lot of listeners. You’ll hear that before being diagnosed with cancer, I never truly believed I was deserving of my success. Today I not only explain why, but I share the affirmation that’s shifting my mindset!
- Learn how perspective can determine your attitude, and therefore the quality of your life.
- How to turn emotional pain and negativity into love and gratitude that serves you unconditionally.
- Transform your relationships and your business, through the act of selflessly giving.
- The single most important way to achieve ultimate freedom in your life. HINT: It doesn’t matter how much money you have, this is something you can take action on today!
- Find out why you should attend The Best Year Ever Blueprint.
JOIN THE CONVERSATION
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[00:00:31] Jon: Part 2. Hal and I, Hal Elrod, and I, Jon Berghoff, had a conversation a couple of weeks ago and it went long enough we realized we needed to turn it into a two-part episode. So, you’re listening in to part 2. If you didn’t catch the first part, I really encourage you go back and listen. This is a dialogue that Hal and I had where we talked about everything from his journey in battling cancer to coffee enemas which is the greatest thing in the world and if you don’t know why, you’ve got to listen in to some stories that we’ve never told and more stories that we’ve never told before. So, have a lot of fun. I hope you enjoy it. If you do, share it with others. You will hear us mentioning our Best Year Ever Blueprint Event because it’s the big project that really brought Hal and I back together. We’ve been friends for 18 years but that project four or five years ago brought us back together. And we know many of you who are listening are going to be joining us in San Diego, November 17, 18, 19 and if you’re planning on joining us but haven’t picked up your ticket yet, do it. Go to BestYearEverLive.com. Get your ticket today. Bring a friend, come to Entrepreneur Day. Hal and I cannot wait to hang out with you. So, enjoy this episode, part 2 of my dialogue with your pal, Yo Pal, Hal Elrod. Take care.
[00:01:40] Jon: What story were we talking about? Oh…
[00:01:43] Hal: Sleeping together in the same bed.
[00:01:44] Jon: Sleeping in the same bed. Yeah. We met together at a Cutco conference and I made a gesture comment, right? Like, “Hey, we should live together one day.” When you’re 17 or 18 you say things that you don’t know if you really mean it. And then you called me like a week-and-a-half later and said, “Hey, I’m moving in,” and I just remember thinking, “Oh, I don’t want somebody living with me.” I live in this one-bedroom studio and you moved in. Now you were very clean and organized so I’m pretty sure when you walked in and you saw how I lived, you were also regretting the decision.
[00:02:15] Hal: Mortified? Yeah.
[00:02:15] Jon: Yeah. But for different reasons.
[00:02:17] Hal: Yeah. So, I walk in. There’s a queen bed in the studio and he had invited me. I thought it was a sincere invitation to move in with him. We were young, it’s fun and my lease was up in my apartment and I walk in then I go, “Where am I going to sleep?” and he goes, “Ahh.” You go, “I’m comfortable with my sexuality if you are.” Sure. There was a king bed or whatever. It’s a big bed and I was like, “Yeah. Actually, I’m comfortable as well.” So, we shared a bed for four months. It was really funny.
[00:02:45] Jon: Yeah. And we had an old school boombox that every morning would wake us up. There was a Yanni CD.
[00:02:50] Hal: Yanni.
[00:02:51] Jon: I think this morning…
[00:02:52] Hal: In the Morning Light.
[00:02:52] Jon: In the Morning Light is the name. Right.
[00:02:55] Hal: In the Morning Light.
[00:02:56] Jon: That was our alarm clock song that would play and we’d wake up and then we’d both go sell Cutco.
[00:03:01] Hal: Yeah.
[00:03:02] Jon: What was fun is when we sold Cutco together. We sold in the same neighborhoods so we would literally drive. We’d get on the highway. We’d get on 280 and we’d go north in we’d get off at the same exit and then we get into the neighborhood, you might turn one way and I’d turn the other and we would be trying sell to people.
[00:03:18] Hal: Well, I know – or I’d call and I’d be like, “Hey, your friend Betty referred you and said you wanted to see some Cutco knives.” They say, “Oh no. Jon Berghoff is my sales rep.” I’m like, “Damn it.” You must have hated me for it because, I mean, I moved in and then I took half your territory.
[00:03:33] Jon: I know. I know. I know. Clearly, there was not a lot of intelligence to that invitation.
[00:03:38] Hal: Yeah. There’s some resentment I’m sure that deep down that you harbor maybe.
[00:03:42] Jon: Yeah. I should go work on that.
[00:03:44] Hal: Yeah. You should probably go to – you should be laying on a couch once a week with a therapist working on – yeah.
[00:03:49] Jon: Yeah. The next time Freddie Wu massages my calf muscles, I’ll see if there are any emotions that come up.
[00:03:55] Hal: I like it.
[00:03:55] Jon: Yeah. Maybe resentment resides in the soleus muscle.
[00:03:58] Hal: So, JB, let me share as we’re – we’re all over the place on this episode.
[00:04:03] Jon: Oh, we had a reason to be here. I actually wanted you to talk to people about what you shared at our Quantum Leap Mastermind meeting and it was a message about what matters most. And so, this was three or four months ago. This was three or four months into your chemo treatment and you shared a message that Mike McCarthy, one of our Quantum Leap Mastermind members, he the next night had showed me that he had done this whole worksheet that you had given us. He said this was worth the entire trip for him. So, I’d love for you to share with everybody a little bit about this message that you shared with us at Quantum Leap because I think it highlights probably the most important value that you have captured in my mind from what you’re going through that you have shared with others. And it took us an hour and 10 minutes to remember that’s why we were here.
[00:04:51] Hal: This is a two-part episode I think, buddy. I don’t know if we’ve ever done a two-part episode but I think we might have to break this one into two.
[00:04:57] Jon: We’re doing it right now.
[00:04:58] Hal: At least as far as the podcast goes.
[00:05:00] Jon: Yeah.
[00:05:01] Hal: Yeah. In terms of what matters most when I was preparing for our mastermind and I was thinking what can I share of value, I feel like I’ve learned a lot through this experience and as far as everything happens for a reason but it’s our responsibility to choose the reasons that this is a big part of it. It’s going, “Well, what matters most out of this experience?” Like this cancer happening, what are the most powerful and profound, not only lessons that I can learn but changes that I can make in my life and I think that’s right. You learn a lesson but you don’t make a change or implement the lesson, the value that it holds is pretty minimal. And so, for me, there are four buckets, if you will, of what matters most and the first is perspective. There’s the ideology we’ve all heard, attitude is everything, but if you think about it, it is our perspective that determines our attitude.
Our perspective determines our attitude. Meaning you could say, “Hey, I have a positive attitude,” but if you’re not maintaining a perspective that allows you to find meaning in adversity, in the things in your life, the challenges, the things that aren’t going right, also and this is true for relationships. Like, I think relationships are a great microcosm for life and often the lessons that we learn in life apply to relationships. So, for example, acceptance. Accepting life before it happens or accepting things that we can’t change and the idea that all of our emotional pain is self-created by the opposite of acceptance which is resistance to the degree that we resist our reality is the degree we create emotional pain for ourselves. Well, think about that in a relationship. It’s really the same cause of pain. All of our pain in our relationships is also a result of nonacceptance or resistance to something the other person does or says or is. So, if your significant other or your child or whatever, if they do something, think about it, you get upset over something they did, well you can’t change it. Or if it’s something they do habitually then it’s a part of who they are, you can’t change other people.
[00:07:05] Hal: And so, in the same way that acceptance in life is what gives us peace in our lives and allows us to be free from emotional pain, acceptance in relationships, accepting other people as they are, not wishing they were different or wanting them to be different but just being at peace with how they are and who they are which really is what unconditional love is. That’s what unconditional love is, loving people as they are. And acceptance and unconditional love, they go hand-in-hand. And so, I think having a perspective in your life that allows you to realize that every negative experience you have is rarely about the experience and it’s all about your perspective on the experience. And so, it’s the same with the cancer. It’s when I called you, Jon, I was laughing and smiling saying, “Hey, Jon, dude, I might have cancer,” and I said it’s…
Before I forget, I called Jon Vroman right after I called you and I called Vroman. I said, “Jon, I’ve always joked with you that I wanted a retroactive Front Row Foundation experience for the time I died in my car accident.” I said, “When am I going to get a Front Row experience?” And I go, “And I think I just manifested a Front Row experience now with this cancer.” Anyway, the point is, when you accept the things that you can’t change, you can laugh at them. You can make fun. Even if you’re not excited about it, even if it wasn’t – I didn’t want cancer but if I got cancer, I couldn’t change it and so I could either be miserable and depressed over it and this is true for everything in your life down to traffic every day. If you don’t like traffic, take something that’s not like a death or a major disease but something every day like traffic. People go through traffic and they’re frustrated and they’re upset. It’s not the traffic that’s causing that. It’s the fact that you’re not willing to accept the traffic. You’re resisting the traffic, therefore creating emotional pain for yourself.
[00:09:05] Hal: But when you accept all things you can’t change, you can be at peace with them. And those three words, “Can’t change it.” That’s what my mom said the other day to me, Jon, and I thought that was so cool that my mom – because I go, “Mom, you’re the one that taught me that the way you responded to your adversity when you lost Emery,” when my sister passed away. And she goes, “I think I’m pretty good at it but those three words, can’t change it.” She said, “Those allowed me to bring it into everyday life.” She goes, “I was good in it for the big stuff, losing someone, but everyday life I would forget it.” It took a tragedy for me to go, “Okay. What can I learn from this? How can I help others with this?” She goes, “But then everyday life like traffic,” she said, “I’d be frustrated. But then I realize, wait a minute, can’t change it.”
And she goes, “Then when I say those three words, it brings a smile to my face because I remind myself, ‘Wait. I can’t change it. There’s no point being upset about it. I don’t need to be angry. I don’t need to be upset whether it’s with a situation or it’s with another person, someone that you love, with your child, with your spouse.’” When you just accept all things unconditionally and it takes practice but you live free from emotional pain or it’s very minimal and it’s a great way to live. So, perspective is the first part. I think the biggest thing that matters is the foundation because your perspective on everything in your life determines how you feel which therefore determines the quality of your life. So, Jon, any thoughts on perspective, buddy?
[00:10:30] Jon: I do have thoughts but I’ll let you continue if you had more to share.
[00:10:34] Hal: I can keep going. So, the second thing that matters most is and I’m going to bucket these together as one but love and gratitude. Love and gratitude. And I didn’t realize one of the things this cancer has taught me is that there’s a whole new level of love and gratitude available to us. It’s almost like I guess most things in life where there is no ceiling to potential. You can get better at just about anything. That’s why even the world’s greatest athletes continue to practice their craft. They’re trying to – Michael Phelps is trying to shave a millisecond off of his time. Michael Jordan or Lebron James is trying to get his free throw percentage from whatever it is, 82% to 84% or whatever. I’m making those numbers up but the point is you always get better at something. Well, love and gratitude I realize it falls into that category and in terms of love and gratitude, one thing that I realized is self-love is something that I was actually not very good at and that was a big realization for me.
In fact, there’s a book called Get a Ph.D. in YOU, two books I recommend. Number one is actually from one of our Quantum Leap Mastermind members, Julie Reisler, Get a Ph.D. in YOU talks a lot about self-love and the other book is called Love Yourself Like Your Life Depends on It. I recommend getting those two books, A Ph.D. in YOU and Love Yourself Like Your Life Depends on It. And self-love is something I hadn’t really even been aware of. And one of the causes that I’ve identified of my cancer possibly and I don’t know what caused it, the doctor said they don’t know what causes leukemia but I want to own responsibility for everything in my life as much as I can. So, while some will say, “Hal, leukemia is a freak thing. It could be genetic. It could be this.” Yes, maybe. But I want to look at what might I have done? Maybe I didn’t but what might I have done that could’ve caused the leukemia? And one of the things is I never felt like I deserved the success that I had.
[00:12:34] Hal: And I had this kind of subconscious fear or insecurity and actually had verbalized this to you and Matt Recor and a few of my friends before but I was waiting for the next adversity in my life. I went, “You know what, I went to this car accident and it allowed me to help a lot of people.” Life’s gotten too easy. Life’s just normal now like I’m not going through any major adversity and it was almost like I was waiting for it. And it was unconscious and it would become conscious sometimes I’d be aware of it but it was always like this monkey on my back like in the back of my mind that I don’t know what, who am I to have this success? I’m the guy that goes through adversity and learns from it. And so, now I have an affirmation that says I deserve to be happy, healthy and successful for the rest of my life and never have cancer or any other disease for the rest of my life.
And so, now I affirm it every day so that I replaced that negative – and by the way, this is a great lesson for all of us that anything, any fear, any insecurity, any negative self-image that you – anything that you have that’s not serving you, any part of your mindset that’s not serving you, any way that you look at the world, any part of your perspective that is negative, that’s detrimental that causes you stress, that causes you pain or fear, whatever form of emotional pain, may be causing you regret because something in the past you’re still hanging on to, you haven’t accepted it, anything in your perspective that causes you with other people, anything any harboring negative belief or something from the past that you’re holding inside toward another human being, any grudge, anything that is causing you pain that’s not serving you, you can create an affirmation that reframes it, that reframes the perspective that reminds you or guides you to look at things in a way that doesn’t cause you stress but causes you to feel at ease, that doesn’t cause you to hold a grudge but that it reminds you to love all people unconditionally.
[00:14:48] Hal: And that if you were them, you might be the same way so who are you to judge them? If you had grown up living their life, you might be the same way. Who are you to judge them? And that’s true for all people. But so, for me as soon as I have a shift in perspective it’s positive or if I realized that I have something negative I’m holding on to, I just put it in writing in my affirmations and read it every single day and reprogram and reaffirm it. And so, back to the love and gratitude piece, I’ll tell you something I did probably three months ago. I woke up one morning at 4:30 in the morning to do my Miracle Morning and my wife and my son were sleeping in the bed next to me. My son and daughter normally sleep in their own bed but my son had woken up the middle of the night. He’s four and my wife has brought him to our bed. And so, I woke up and I looked at them. And I was about to leave to do my Miracle Morning and then I thought, “Wait a minute. Look at them sleeping. They’re so sweet.” And I just sat there and I thought I want to deepen my love for them right now actively. I want to deepen my gratitude for them right now actively.
And so, I sat there and I stared at my wife and I meditated. I just thought through how blessed I was to have her in my life and how beautiful she is inside and out and how grateful I am for her and I felt it as deep as I could to where my eyes is crying just looking at her and then I looked at my son. I did the same thing and of course, I went to my affirmations and I wrote a little reminder in there, “Hey, this morning, Hal, you had an amazing experience where you meditated to deepen your love and gratitude for your wife and your son. Do this more often. Do it more often.” And so, that’s something that we can all do is there’s this level of love and gratitude that we have that’s usually very surface. It’s usually very intellectual. Yeah. I love him. Yeah. I love her. Of course, I’m grateful for them. They’re my family but it really does come from our head and we often don’t let it penetrate our soul, come from our heart and penetrate our soul.
[00:16:53] Hal: And I want to share one other thing that I did that really, in fact, this was what Mike McCarthy shared I think as when I shared this message at our Quantum Leap Mastermind, I think he said this made the biggest impact for him and I would imagine for his wife too. But I had a realization. This was right before the cancer. I’m really grateful that I have this for the cancer but the realization was I decided that instead of in my relationship with my wife, we often keep score unconsciously. It’s like you do something for them, they do something for you and if they don’t do something for you, you’re kind of like, “Well why would I do this for you if you’re not doing what you should be doing for me?” Whether it’s taking out the trash or emotionally like sex or whatever it is. I decided I didn’t realize this but I am kind of keeping score unconditionally. I think we do in our relationships. I do with you definitely, Jon.
[00:17:44] Jon: Boy, I got a checklist over here.
[00:17:45] Hal: Of course. Of course. Yeah. Actively. But no. But so, I decided, “You know what, I’m going to shift. My new commitment is to make my wife’s life amazing with no expectation of anything in return and taking nothing personally.” If my wife’s having a bad day and I feel like she’s taking it out on me, that’s not going to change that my commitment is unwavering. It is to make her life amazing and to do it for my kids as well. To do everything in my power to give them the life of their dreams and not just in a big picture sense like buy them a home or whatever, provide for them, but no, every day, every moment asking myself, “What can I do in this moment to make my wife’s life amazing?” And I’ll tell you, when that’s your commitment and it kind of goes back to what I try to do with my community, just, “How can I add value? How can I add value? How can I add value?” It’s not about what I get in return. How can I add value?
And like Jon said, when you do that for long enough, everything else takes care of itself. Money, everything takes care of itself. When you add value to the world, when you add value to the people in your life and you add value to your relationships, it’s not instant so some people might go, “Well, I made my wife’s life amazing today and she was rude to me or she didn’t respond the way I wanted her to.” That’s keeping score. It’s just this unconditional, unwavering. It’s just about you giving to the people around you that’s adding value, selflessly adding value. And when I did that, it transformed my relationship with my wife. It transformed every aspect of our marriage and it was great. There were no complaints but it went from great to just unbelievable and that was the focus. It gets that level of love and gratitude where you’re actively loving other people by focusing on what you can give, not what you can get.
[00:19:38] Hal: And the last thing I want to say on that, Jon, is that when you focus on what you can get out of situations and most of us that’s like human nature. We focus on getting the most out of every situation. And when you do that, it is stressful. It also causes a lot of conflict in our lives. People sense it. They know you’re trying to get as much as you can and then it becomes a competition. They’re trying to get as much as they can. So, when you focus on getting as much as you can at every situation, it causes a lot of stress and conflict. But when you shift that and instead of focusing on getting, you’re focused on giving as much as you can every situation then what that does is it’s liberating.
So, we focus on getting. It’s stressful but focus on giving as much as you can to every person and every situation, to your clients, you loved ones, etcetera, and that becomes liberating because you’re not keeping score. You’re just going, “I’m going to show up and give as much as I can. If somebody likes it, great. If they take it, great. If they reject me and tell me I’m a jerk and they don’t want anything to do with me, that’s okay because I wasn’t giving for what I was going to get in return. I was just giving because that’s who I am and that’s the way I want to show up in the world.” I’m out of breath.
[00:20:52] Jon: Yo Pal, Hal.
[00:20:53] Hal: I got one last thing I’ll share, Jon, and just a real quick thing and we’ll talk more about this on another podcast but the last thing I think that matters most is freedom and that to me is nothing’s been more beneficial for me and my family than creating a life of freedom. When I say freedom, I mean the freedom to do what you want to do, do work that you love, spend time with people that you want to spend time with, etcetera. It’s doing work that I love. It’s creating a schedule that puts my priorities first, health, family, etcetera. So, those have shifted now. My priorities have – I always said those are the priorities but if you look at my schedule before cancer, they weren’t reflective of family being a priority when I was working most of the time. Now, it’s I only work when my kids are at school. But the big part of that and this is something that we’re going to – at the Entrepreneur Day at Best Year Ever, I’m going to give a whole message on this but it’s creating passive income that enables all of that freedom.
So, being able to create passive income that allows me to spend time with my family as much as I want, that’s allowed me to focus on healing because my businesses are in place and our teams in place that’s allowed me to spend the last seven months not working very much. And luckily, I have people like Jon that will step up and do the podcast and Honoree Corder, who helps run our book series and Tiffany that runs everything and my wife. But putting this team in place of amazing people and creating, I guess, it’s a business but these passive income streams giving that financial freedom has been a really, really crucial part of this. And I never knew how much, you don’t know how much something matters until you put in a situation where you – I don’t know how to even articulate that but you know where I’m going with that, right? You know how much it matters until you’re forced to have to leverage it and I had to leverage the financial resources that I put in place over the last 10 years and it was just a game changer. It’s allowed my family to thrive and me to thrive in the face of the health challenges.
[00:22:48] Hal: And that’s part of Support the Unsupported is I realize, you know what, until I can teach people how to do that and create those income streams, that’s not an overnight thing. I want to support the people that don’t have those financial resources in place and that they can afford the supplements or the caregiver or whatever that I’ve been blessed to be able to bring into my life during these really challenging times. And so, for that, it’s just being grateful for it but then paying it forward. So, those three things, it’s maintaining perspective, really amplifying your love and gratitude, actively sharing with other people that really improves all of your relationships, not just your personal relationships but that to me, loving your employees, your clients, your partners, really loving on them and adding value for them and focusing how much you can give to them is huge. And then last but not least, making sure that your time, a large part of it is dedicated to creating freedom in your life and maybe it’s going to take a few years but I’ll tell you, once you get there, it’s one of the most beneficial things you can do for you and your family and people that you love and that you want to make an impact for.
[00:23:59] Jon: Wow, buddy. I would love to hear all of that again from the top.
[00:24:03] Hal: All right. You re-listen to the podcast.
[00:24:07] Jon: Oh, rewind. That’s so great. You know, there’s a lot that you just said that I would love to add to but I don’t feel a need to. I will share two simple thoughts. Well actually, you know what, I take that back. I’m going to share all my thoughts.
[00:24:22] Hal: Yeah. Do it. Remember, we’re going to do a two-part episode. You’re good. We got it.
[00:24:26] Jon: Yeah. By now we’re on part 3.
[00:24:27] Hal: Yeah. Part 4.
[00:24:29] Jon: So, I just want to acknowledge and affirm what you said about what you call self-love and anybody who’s listening to this can define self-love in any way that you want to and I interpret that as I get to take care of myself. I got to take care of myself and not just physically but mentally, emotionally and that’s actually something that I feel like in all of the buckets of my life I had ones where I certainly struggled, that’s one where I’ve done a great job. And one of the things that I have found is that the harder life gets, the more important it is that I do what’s almost counterintuitive, I have been for a long time aiming to not be productive. I don’t want to check off as many things as I can every day.
[00:25:15] Hal: Yes.
[00:25:15] Jon: I want to get done the fewest things that are most important and even before I get those done, I got to take care of myself. And I just hope that everybody finds their own way to bring that into their lives because there is no formula that I’m aware of but we’ve got to make sure that we’re taking care of ourselves. And for me, I notice it. I notice it in a big, big way and so I’m so glad to hear you share that, buddy. I want to say something about this idea of giving as well. So many of our community here are entrepreneurs and one of the things that I love as an entrepreneur is when you shifted the lens from what can I get and how many people can I close and convert and not that you have to turn that off but when you shift the mixture to where you’re also coming a lot from a place of how am I adding, how am I creating, how am I generating a net positive impact with my network and my networking within my network? One of the things that I have found is that as an entrepreneur when I put energy into giving, what happens is I actually become more creative. I become more entrepreneurially intelligent.
[00:26:27] Jon: I become a better entrepreneur because entrepreneurship in its essence is about creating more value than what people are paying for. So, giving can actually become a whole strategy and that’s something that, Hal, you’re talking about it one way, I really hope everyone is hearing it in many different ways but I will tell you as an entrepreneur it was fun, Hal, as you and I have talked about this for a long time, you and I are a great case study of two entrepreneurs who have both achieved a certain level of accomplishment but in very, very different ways.
[00:27:05] Hal: Yeah.
[00:27:05] Jon: And yet what’s interesting, it could be easy to look at your business and go, “Wow. Hal has – he’s built an audience of hundreds and hundreds of thousands of people,” and that has created a really healthy economic engine. You look at my business, I have an audience of zero if you could look at it that way. Yet I have this fascinatingly healthy economic engine. We have a small, small number of people that pay us lots and lots of money to do what we do in our world but yet even though on the surface what you and I do looks different, fundamentally we’re driven by the same value and we’ve both been driven by value for a long time which is create value which is about giving, which is about solving problems. Even if I’m not the one who my business is not the solution, if I discovered that somebody who I want to do business with one day or I just want to help them one day that they need something that I don’t have, well, can I go find the thing they need and be the connector? Can I be the resource? Not just because my business is selling something. So, I love that point, buddy.
And I want to say one thing about freedom because I think there is an additional perspective around freedom and my imagination says that there are some of you who are watching us who are listening right now who when you hear Hal’s description of freedom, it could be very easy for the little voice in our heads to say, “Well, I love that but, boy, am I very far from that.” When you hear somebody talk about being able to do what you love or love what you do and having choices in life and I think that’s a great aim for everybody and some people get there in different ways, at different rates. But I think there’s another type of freedom for everybody to consider. Because I believe and this is just my perspective that if we hold this idea that the only freedom that’s out there is the ability to work when I want and have everything I want to have, that can be a bit limiting because we just moved the finished line. We just moved the hurdle.
[00:29:03] Jon: As soon as I have all the things that I thought I wanted, now I want more things or more choices. There are always more choices I could want to have. So, I want to offer an additional way to look at freedom. Because I believe, Hal, that you haven’t always had and I haven’t always had the freedom of choices that you and I have today.
[00:29:24] Hal: Sure.
[00:29:24] Jon: But for a very long time since the beginning, we’ve always had another type of freedom that’s available to us, and I’d encourage everybody to think about this, and it’s the freedom to behave or act or to take action in alignment with what we want to value. So, I might not be able to sail on the boat or live on the island or fly on the plane or do all of these things or all these choices that at some point I’d like to have. However, what nothing can ever take away from me, nothing can stop me from doing is the freedom to say, “Well, I value XYZ in my life,” whatever that is, relationships, community, creating for others, contributing, whatever it is and in this moment, I’m going to behave in alignment with those values. Yeah. I think the most unconditional freedom that we all have, the ultimate freedom, is to decide to act in alignment with our values. And I think that when we do that, that’s the highest level of integrity.
The highest integrity is to say, “This is what I value,” and to actually behave in alignment with that. And I think if we spent enough time acting in alignment with what we value, I’ve seen this for me, I’ve seen it for you, Hal, I’ve seen it for many others, there’s something that is inherent or that is embedded in that idea and that is excellence. Because when we say, “Here’s what I value,” and then we work hard to try and close that gap between what we say we value and how we actually show up every day, that demands excellence of ourselves. And in the long run that excellence can then lead to all of the more superficial visible outcomes, the choices that we want but nobody can take away from any of you that you have the freedom to declare what you value and then to decide if you’re going to act in alignment with that value. So, I just wanted to add those thoughts there, buddy, and, hey, we’re like four hours into our seven-episode conversation here.
[00:31:22] Jon: At some point, we should share with people that on November 17, 18, 19 in San Diego when we – and that will be the first time you’re back at an event for everyone to hang out with you. It’s going to be great. Our Best Year Ever Live Blueprint Event, we want to invite all of you to come join us. We sell it out every year. I’m certain that’ll happen again for this year especially with you having been gone last year, buddy. People are going to be pumped to hang out with you. But one of the things that we do at that event, Hal, you made the comment earlier about how important it is to experience gratitude not just intellectually understand it. And one of the things that we do at this event, I’m not going to give it away, there’s an exercise we did two years ago, we didn’t do it last year, but where we have people actually experience it.
We don’t really talk a lot about it where we have experienced gratitude that for many I bumped into them or I get notes through Facebook, whatever, and they talk about, “Oh man, I’ll never forget that,” and it’s just a great reinforcement, Hal, that what we do in November for those of you that join us is we create an experience where people can convert their adversities into their advantages. We create an experience where people can declare what they value and then figure out what it looks like to act in alignment with that. And we create an experience in November where people can move much closer to every definition of freedom because they take the time and space to be around others who are on the same journey of wanting to stand for nothing but excellence. So, I know many of you who are watching and listening, you’ve joined us the last three years, four years, eight years, we’ve forgotten…
[00:32:50] Hal: How many years we have done it?
[00:32:51] Jon: I think it’s our 20-year anniversary coming up.
[00:32:53] Hal: Yeah. Coming up. Best Year Ever Blueprint.
[00:32:56] Jon: Should we skip a few years and just declare this year our eighth-year anniversary just to see if anybody says anything.
[00:33:00] Hal: If anyone notices? Yeah.
[00:33:02] Jon: But we can’t wait to be with all of you in November which is coming up really fast. That’s why I just wanted to make that comment. I know many of you listening, watching, we’re going to be there with you. So, Hal, what else you’re going to talk about?
[00:33:10] Hal: And if you’re – yeah. Those videos you were talking about, the masterclass videos. Should we tell…
[00:33:15] Jon: Oh, this is like – this was supposed to be the first thing we…
[00:33:18] Hal: That’s your idea.
[00:33:19] Jon: Yeah. Yeah.
[00:33:20] Hal: Masterclass videos, that’s your…
[00:33:22] Jon: Yeah. Oh yeah, this is so fun. This is great. And what’s great is this is completely in alignment with this idea of adding value. So, fun announcement here. If you’re watching, if you’re listening and then we’re done so please stay tuned for this announcement. This is really cool. So, at last year’s event, we made an investment and the investment we made is we had a couple of extra cameras on site and what we did is we captured the event with excellence knowing that we might want to turn the event into like a mini docu series, if that’s even a thing. Nowadays the trendy word is to call it a masterclass. I love that. You call anything a masterclass it must mean something, right?
[00:34:02] Hal: Sounds impressive.
[00:34:03] Jon: Yeah. Sounds impressive. Let’s just call it video, people. So, we have a mini docu masterclass series. That is all in one word. And here’s what’s really cool. It’s free. We’re giving it away and what we’ve done is we had spliced up little micro moments from the Best Year Ever Blueprint Event like 30 to 90-second moments at the event and we have Nick Conedera, our filmmaker, is creating a series of videos right now. There might end up being eight of them, 10 of them, 12 of them and what we’re about to do is in the next, let’s just call it week or two, we’re going to start releasing these videos and they’re just value-added videos. That’s it. And there’s no like sales pitch in these videos. It’s literally just giving away value from the event last year and we would invite any of you to share these videos with your community, with your networks. So, once you see these videos, please share them with others. They’re entirely all about adding value and so those will be released in the next few weeks.
[00:35:02] Hal: And a way to get them, JB, is if you go to BestYearEverLive.com at the site about the event, put BestYearEverLive.com and if you opt in for more info, that’s who we’re going to be sending the videos. We’ll post them in Facebook group, the Miracle Morning community. That’s how you ensure that you get them. So, BestYearEverLive.com and if you get on that specific email list, that’s just for those videos. So, we’ll send those out as soon as – they’re all ready and I think the first two or three are done but we want to get the whole series and we’ll send those out one at a time.
[00:35:32] Jon: Yeah. And those of you, a whole bunch of people just posted questions about the event on the live stream. So, go to BestYearEverLive.com. A few things that we have done a terrible job. Actually, we just haven’t announced this at all but this is the first year that we have different payment plans available for the event. So, go check that out and if you’re thinking about coming to the event and you’re deciding between being there for two days, or three days, if you’re an entrepreneur or you aspire to, you do not want to miss the Entrepreneur Day on Friday.
The only other encouragement I would give is anyone who is coming to this event, bring a friend with you. We give discounts if you come with a second person. And if you have a team, I cannot tell you how many people come to this event and they tell us repeatedly three things. One is they love the event. You don’t have to take our word for it. Go talk to people who have been there, watch the videos. And then the other thing people say is, “I wish I would’ve brought my spouse. I wish I would’ve brought my business partner or a wish I would’ve brought a team with me.” Because you come to an event like this and your whole team can go through a planning process where they set up really well for their next year to have the best year ever and it’s hard to bring that back home.
[00:36:37] Hal: It was actually cool. You mentioned bringing their – they wished they would’ve brought their teenager. I think it was, well, I was there so a year before last, was it Tim? I’m trying to remember who it was. Maybe it was Tim but he brought his 15-year-old daughter and she like, he had to drag her there, kicking and screaming. She’s like, “Dad, I don’t want to go to this.” So, he paid for her to go, of course, brought her to the event and at the end of the three days, she said, “Dad, I am coming next year but I want to pay for it because I want to earn this.” And so, yeah, I thought that was so cool that a 15-year-old she was like, “Dad, I don’t want to go to some personal development event with you,” by the end of it was signed up for the following year and she said, “I’m paying for it because I want it to be something that I earn.”
[00:37:21] Jon: That’s so cool. That is so cool. Great. Anything else we should talk about, buddy?
[00:37:25] Hal: I’m sure there’s probably – we probably left out lots of things to talk about but we’ll have to record them to podcast too. I got to go. I’m actually going into the hospital tomorrow for my eighth and final in-hospital four-day intensive treatment. This is the one that I usually get some sort of terrible infection that puts me back in the hospital for like…
[00:37:43] Jon: Oh my gosh.
[00:37:45] Hal: But I’ve set the intention. I’m trying to do everything that I can holistically so that doesn’t happen but, everybody, if you’re watching this on the live stream, please say a prayer. I know there’s a lot of you out there that need prayers but I could use one for the next four days that it goes off without a hitch and the next few weeks I can come back to my family and not be back in the hospital for a week or two. So, that’s my intention that I’ve set and so if you’re with me, I appreciate it.
[00:38:08] Jon: That’s awesome. Well, buddy, there’s the – I’ve been watching the chat stream online and there are lots of supportive folks in the community sending positive energy, sending love, healing energy. So, good luck, buddy. Thanks for being here with us today and we’ll bring you back on the podcast, whenever you want, of course.
[00:38:26] Hal: Yeah. Thanks for bringing me back on my podcast, buddy. That’s a nice offer.
[00:38:29] Jon: No.
[00:38:32] Hal: The way you…
[00:38:32] Jon: I’ll run it by the committee here.
[00:38:34] Hal: Yeah. The way you said that it was, “Hey, maybe we’ll bring you back on.”
[00:38:38] Jon: Maybe.
[00:38:40] Hal: Great. Hey, thanks for running the show for me.
[00:38:42] Jon: It’s been great, man. I can’t believe it’s been however many months it’s been. Somebody told me six months.
[00:38:45] Hal: I know. Seven months – no wait. It’s been a while. When I come back, I’m thinking we’ll take a vote. We’ll have our loyal listeners vote. You want Hal to come back and take over or keep it Hal and Jon? Let’s do – we’ll take turns. You do an episode, I do an episode.
[00:39:00] Jon: I know what my vote is.
[00:39:01] Hal: Yeah.
[00:39:02] Jon: I’m looking at the list here. I was wondering if I had a favorite episode. Yeah. They’ve all been fun. They’ve all been really cool.
[00:39:08] Hal: Yeah. What’s your favorite episode? Because I haven’t been able to listen to all of them.
[00:39:11] Jon: Yeah. I have to think about that.
[00:39:14] Hal: Christopher Lochhead. You always talk about Lochhead.
[00:39:16] Jon: Well, he’s just a marketing genius and a wildly entertaining guy at the same time.
[00:39:20] Hal: He’s just outrageously funny and smart, yeah.
[00:39:22] Jon: Yeah. He kind of a double value there. I’m looking at the list. It’s Jordan Harbinger, Vroman, Jamie Masters, Lochhead, Julianna Raye, Gail Goodwin, David Osborn, Ryland Engelhart, Jay Papasan, Robert Kiyosaki, Natalie, the author of your…
[00:39:35] Hal: It’s a good list.
[00:39:35] Jon: …Miracle Morning for College Students. Roberta Baskin, Alissa Daire Nelson, one of our Quantum Leap members, another one with Vroman, Karen, a quantum leaper. So, half of these people we met at our Best Year Ever Blueprint which is really cool, Andy Storch, last week. Actually, last week is really funny. I don’t know if I even told you this, buddy, which is fun for other people.
[00:39:53] Hal: You just played an interview of yours?
[00:39:54] Jon: Yeah. So, Andy interviewed me for this episode.
[00:39:56] Hal: Lazy.
[00:39:57] Jon: And I got off that. I’m like, “Oh man, that would knock one off the list if I could just replay that. So, that worked out well so thanks, Andy Storch of The Entrepreneurial Hot Seat. Great guy.
[00:40:08] Hal: Awesome. Well, buddy, thank you for holding down the fort and doing such a great job and a great feedback. And everybody watching or listening, just thank you for listening, thank you for your time, your energy, your attention. And for those of you that just for your support, your prayers, your love, like all of it, it’s overwhelmingly positive and amazing. And by the way, we do, although we don’t know exactly what Support the Unsupported is going to do other than to support people that need support, we do have a Facebook group so we did start there. So, all the nonprofits being formed you can go to Facebook. You can go to Support the Unsupported.
So, what happened is in the Miracle Morning community on Facebook, Jon, we sort of getting so many people that were kind of following my lead and all of a sudden now it becomes the prayer request and all sorts of stuff that was important but it wasn’t really part of the Miracle Morning, you know, it wasn’t really related to the Miracle Morning. So, we created Support the Unsupported kind of move, ask everybody to move over any prayer request over to Support the Unsupported. So, if you need support, if you have a prayer request, go to Support the Unsupported, the Facebook group and that’s a good spot for it. And, yeah, we’ll hopefully see you in person at the first opportunity that I’m off to meet everybody since this diagnosis. Jon, the weird thing is I don’t know if my hair, A, I don’t know if it will ever grow back. I think it will but…
[00:41:22] Jon: I have a question.
[00:41:23] Hal: Yeah. I don’t have hair back. I’m interested in how I’m going…
[00:41:27] Jon: We got to do the wigs. We got to do the wigs.
[00:41:28] Hal: Oh, that’s right. That’s right. Yeah. That was fun.
[00:41:32] Jon: Didn’t the chemo allow you to start growing a mustache?
[00:41:35] Hal: It did. It did. I can’t find the picture but now, yeah, so I’ve never been able to grow a mustache, everybody. I just don’t grow facial hair. It’s like very patchy. It’s not even patchy. It’s like one hair here, one hair here, one hair here. And all of a sudden, I come out of chemo and I’m home for like three weeks and I start getting this crazy five o’clock shadow and it’s this big thick bushy black mustache and then it went away. Now I can’t grow hair like, yeah, I don’t know what’s going to happen.
[00:42:03] Jon: Wild. How about that, huh? How about that?
[00:42:05] Hal: But it was funny but I let it grow because my wife was out of town. I mean it was hideous. It’s just like hideous. Not that mustaches are hideous but it just didn’t look good on me. And so, I took a selfie and I sent it to Jon and our other friends and I go, “Cancer’s given me a lot of gifts but probably none better than this ability to grow this incredible mustache which I’m keeping for Ursula to come home,” and she came home and she’s like, “What? Shave that.” I’m like, “No, sweetie. This is – I’m going to keep…”
[00:42:31] Jon: This is real.
[00:42:32] Hal: “This is my look.” And anyway so…
[00:42:35] Jon: Yeah. The mustache comes in second place though to the coffee enema which I think we need a whole episode on that.
[00:42:40] Hal: I can’t believe how many people I’ve already got doing coffee enemas. That’s a microcosm of I’m going to have thousands…
[00:42:45] Jon: I think it’s great. We do coffee enemas here in the office on Thursdays.
[00:42:50] Hal: We call it Coffee Enema Thursdays.
[00:42:53] Jon: All right.
[00:42:53] Hal: All right. All right, everybody. Thank you for tuning in. All right, buddy. I love you, JB.
[00:42:57] Jon: I love you, buddy. This is great. We’ll talk soon, buddy.
[00:42:58] Hal: All right. Talk to you soon.
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